New Year, New Me (Who This?)

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I’m not usually the one to make resolutions, but this year is a little different for a few reasons. I’m working full time with no intent to chicken out and go back to academia (despite my constant threats to no one in particular to open a café), which means I have money for the first time in a long time as well as some unstructured free time. Because I turn 30 this year, I thought it would be prudent to make some resolutions so that I do not coast through the next decade of my life (a complaint I continually made in my 20s).

Its one thing to say “I resolve to $x$”, it is another thing to explain how one will achieve things. I welcome anyone’s input because, shit, I don’t know what I’m doing.

  1. Finish my Ph.D. By the time I am 30 (early September), I want to at the very least be making edits to the thesis after defending. My approach to achieving this is simple; be selfish. There is no requirement that I publish any parts of my thesis. Considering I do not plan to be an academic, wasting time and energy on preparing something for submission would only benefit my supervisor (which is fine, but won’t ultimately help me finish). My approach is to be vocal, polite, but ultimately selfish when it comes to the work. A good thesis is a finished thesis, so the sooner I can finish the sooner it can be considered good. Besides, I can always leave some easy pubs for some future grad student.

  2. Be more self compassionate. My therapist says I lack self compassion. One of the ways people can value themselves and be compassionate towards themselves – at least according to my therapist – is to treat themselves to things they enjoy. So I’m adopting the line from Twin Peaks as a mantra of sorts: Every day, once a day, give yourself a little present. Don’t plan it, don’t wait for it, just let it happen.. A few pumps of flavored syrup in my coffee, Uber Eats because its raining, an extra trip to the barber because hey I like my cut fresh, if it makes me feel good I will do it for myself no matter how small or big. One of the ways I am going to be more compassionate is to throw myself an absolutely bougie 30th birthday.

  3. Somewhat vainly, get shredded for my 30th. I don’t need to be huge (I tried power lifting, I liked it but gyms aren’t the same right now and probably won’t be for a long while), but maybe more lean. I want to fight against the bias I have in my mind that my 30s are somehow a slow decline into … being old. One of the ways I am going to do that is by eating healthier. I know, a trite goal if ever there was one. But let me explain. I usually have a cup of coffee for breakfast until around 8pm wherein hunger strikes and I binge eat anything I have in stock, which is usually nothing. I find grocery shopping really tiring, and cooking even more tiring. In order to ease some of that pain, I’m going to have a standard list of stuff I’m going to order online on repeat biweekly or weekly. Every week, the same low effort but healthy meals, in moderate proportions. I think removing some of the obstacles to eating and cooking (mainly the deciding) will go a long way to helping me keep healthy eating habits.